When I was a kid, my parents taught me to “call collect” if I ever needed to reach home. These days, it’s more reasonable to give your kids their own phone. But when you can afford the best, do you automatically give your kids the best iPhone available?
Our Technology and Health teams build close relationships with our clients in the home. Part of building that relationship is that we hear about everyday concerns in their lives. And it’s not uncommon for our technology member services group to work with clients struggling to decide what (and how much) they should buy for their children when it comes to technology such as computers and iPhones.
Our inaugural Speaker Series event (hosted at the Ritz-Carlton, Boston Common), featured speaker-author Coventry Edwards-Pitt. Drawing from her experience as the Chief Wealth Officer at Ballentine Partners, Coventry interviewed numerous inheritors to discover the parenting techniques that lead them to become successful and grounded adults. Coventry discussed the lessons learned from these real life stories, giving those who attended important ideas about how to tackle these challenges and take the steps necessary to set their children on a path toward success, independence, and happiness.
Hosted in an intimate setting and with a small group, Coventry discussed the four common threads that all of the successful heirs she interviewed shared:
They experienced financial freedom early in life and had an opportunity to make their own money. As children, they experienced challenges that they weren’t rescued from, and that allowed them to grow. They were given the freedom and support to set and pursue their own vocational goals. They felt self-worth based on their own accomplishments, not by what was given to them.
One attendee asked Coventry, “What about when your children grow up in a wealthy milieu? How do you counter that?” Coventry shared an anecdote from one of her interviewees about his first job as a dishwasher. He had worked alongside newly released inmates, a recovering prostitute, and hardworking moms and dads who were working multiple jobs to make ends meet. He described this experience as incredibly memorable and influential, because having that outside exposure allowed him to appreciate the life he had, and also motivated him to be hard-working and productive.
Another attendee asked, “If a child is going to receive wealth at a certain age, do you tell them it’s coming? And do you tell them how much?” Coventry answered that it’s important to be honest about the fact that the family has wealth, though how much doesn’t need to be explicitly discussed. Coventry highlighted a story from an inheritor, who in retrospect was grateful she hadn’t been aware of the exact amount she was set to inherit, because it allowed her to make decisions based on her passion and propelled her internal drive. She felt that had she known, she probably wouldn’t have been as driven, and in turn become the successful and productive person she is today.
Before concluding, Coventry described three key parenting lessons she learned through her research:
Love your child enough to discipline. Do not rescue your child. It’s hard to watch your child struggle, but they need those times to learn how to grow and overcome. Support your child just enough for them to strive for success.
Raised Healthy, Wealthy, and Wise was an insightful presentation for all those in attendance, regardless of wealth bracket, and we were delighted to host Coventry and hear her profound discoveries.
If you’re interested in attending a OneVision Speaker Series event or would like to be considered as a speaker, please contact: firstname.lastname@example.org.